Ya Do What Ya Can

Left Behind

I haven't been to the mall for years. We have a nice mall, as malls go, just a few miles south of us in Modesto. It's got lots of stores, the obligatory food court, a micro brewery, and lots of comfy chairs here and there around the lower level, or at least they did the last time I was there.

There are a number of reasons I don't go there anymore. One is that I am simply at a time of life when I don't need a whole lot of new things. Another is that I am less inclined to like being in crowds, and this mall is a busy place. The main reason I don't go there, however, is that they are really not particularly interested in me. I am the wrong demographic. I don't need toys or funky clothes, nor iPods or Lady Gaga CD's. There is a Sears there, but I don't shop Sears. And no, I have never even been in a Starbucks.

Malls and I have simply grown apart. We've changed. Grown distant. We've gone in different directions.

I mention this because because I have a friend who I think is feeling that way about life. He is in his sixties, and holds a responsible and public position in the community. I think he is getting a little irritated with the rest of us for not going where he is going. He looks around and finds that things aren't ordered the way they used to be, or the way he wants them to be, and indeed maybe the way they should be, and time is running out for him to set things right.. He's complaining a lot. In fact, he's turning into a grumpy old man.

I remember Dad going through this phase as he got older. The Democratic Party broke his heart. He had been a hardcore New Deal Democrat, someone who thought FDR was a saint. The leftward list that had the Party embracing things he clearly thought were immoral disillusioned him. It made him angry, and while he certainly made his concerns known to anyone who would listen, there was obviously nothing he could do -- the Party no longer cared about his demographic.

For years, ever since I ran across the observation, I have been fascinated by the fact that Christ opened the eyes of the blind and cured the lepers, but he did not banish from the world either blindness or leprosy, something that presumably he had the power to do. When he left the world, they were still there.

I know I have to continue to try to make the world (or at least what I touch of it) a better place, but I don't think I have to have it completely fixed in my lifetime, and I shouldn't be surprised or depressed that it's still a mess.

There's nothing I can do about getting old, but grumpy is still a decision.